Xero's other waste of space

April 29, 2004

cheese and onions yet again

Filed under: General — Xero @ 1:42 am

The world is made of cheese and onions. Indeed.

Actually I’m just somewhat bored at the moment which is pretty uncommon these days. Not many people are online at the moment which is somewhat odd but I don’t really care that much, I have things I can do if I wish to waste time but right now I feel like writing.

I think that in the end some people will just not get along with me despite my trying. I can’t really blame myself for being me so I’ll just have to make some hard decisions. I think I should be able to tell when things are going no where.

Either way I’ll be alright – I got enough shit going on already, silly issues like this are nothing in comparison. I think what I need these days is just some positive thinking. No fear or paranoia, no guilt trips and false hope. Just pure neutralness with a sprinkle of optimism. That sounds good enough to eat.

In all reality I’m really just avoiding getting at something I wish I didn’t have to. That is, I don’t want to have to deal with other peoples problems. I try to help people but I just get taken for granted and accused of things which aren’t my true intentions. I’m not perfect – I’m not a psychologist or anything but I still try to understand. I can’t reason with peoples problems though, and I work mainly with reason. I end up making some people upset.

I’m tired of subliminal messages. I don’t like having to be so indirect about things but I’m tired of making people angry as well.

If other people have issues which prohibit them from being able to communicate with me properly then I really can’t be held responsible for that. I don’t have time for silly trust issues and information games. I thought this shit would be over by now but sometimes I think I might be too optimistic.

Sounds kind of funny coming from me – too optimistic. A friend of mine (you know who you are) is very pessimistic compared to me and although it’s sometimes less productive it also made them right about many things. Sometimes I try the impossible, they’d rather not try at all. I haven’t given up all hope in humanity yet, despite how it may seem.

I don’t really have a problem with most of my friends, in fact I get along with most people I talk to really well. There’s some people who I previously would have problems with that I am now fine with, and there’s some I never had problems with before and now do. And then there’s the people I had problems with before and still do.

That last group is the group of people I’ve given too many chances to. I don’t know why, perhaps it’s because they don’t have a problem with me all the time just sometimes, or because it seems they’re changing but in reality they’re not.

Mood swings. I don’t know but it seems maybe some people have pretty severe mood swings. How else is it possible for someone to go from normal discussion to severe anger with just a few lines of chat? We’re all human let’s not fool ourselves. I think I’m being subliminally pushed away, come to think of it.

I’m only good enough in small doses to some people I guess. That’s not good enough for me though, I’m not a toy to be played with at another’s whim. Maybe I’m just pulling this all out of my ass, who knows. I think I’m just doing some self-discovery by typing what’s on my mind, typing out every little suspicion I have.

I’ve been having to hide my instincts out of fear that they might anger some people. I usually end up eventually saying them because I like to say whats on my mind and be honest with people instead of just trying to hint at them. I’m tired of hinting bullshit, like a bunch of stupid teenagers trying to go out on a date and “accidentally” leaving notes or what not.

If people can’t be straight with me then how do they expect me to understand? That’s the thing though, they don’t want me to understand fully, just little censored amounts. I’m tired of that, if people can’t trust me then why the hell tell me anything at all? I am not going to be lead on forever. I will not put up with that forever.

I will survive the stupidity of others but when you care about people who are doing stupid things it’s hard to just blow them off without trying to help them. I’ve done it before though, and there’s no reason at all why I can’t do it again.

I can’t blame myself. It seems like no one is able to prove me wrong anymore – I seem to have improved my bullshit detecting skills to a level higher than ever achieved before. I will just flat out say what I think. I will not censor what I think. If it hurts their feelings then it’s not really my fault – I’m just trying to be honest and help people out. I can’t help people conquer their issues though, so if what I say does make someone upset it’s really up to them to deal with their own issues. I can lead a horse to water but I can’t make it drink.

Which brings me to another topic, I hate horses. In fact I hate most animals which are only still around because humans use them for personal pleasure, such as horses and dogs (wolves.) Most of which are almost extinct in the wild. What kind of existence is living to pleasure humans? I also don’t like dolphins but that’s more because of their intelligence and how humans like to admire it and what not but I don’t admire intelligence as I’ve stated many times before.

Look at sharks, they’re not even close to as smart as dolphins but they have no problem taking them out. Sharks react on instincts and at that they’re very keen. Intelligence doesn’t mean that much if your instincts aren’t so good. Good instincts means good prediction, which means making a plan that works is much easier. There’s plenty of stupid people with good instincts and they do pretty damn well in the world. Look at most pop stars. You’ve got to have good instincts to be able to work your way up the system and know where to be at the right time. Even if their methods involve dishonesty.

It seems these days that most animals are slowly becoming less prevalent as the human population increases, which probably means soon enough all animals that are around will just be around because they benefit us, like farm animals and animals we use for pleasure. The animals we keep around for our own use.

I don’t think evolution will like that very much for some reason. I think that a global population control should be put into effect as soon as possible similar to the one in china but maybe a tad less strict. I know china isn’t exactly the nicest country in the world. I hate babies. I find it funny that maddox recently wrote a thing talking about killing babies after they’re born, something I had been talking about as well. Some might say I try to write like him but in reality we just write similarly. It’s that simple.

I think I’m done for now. And remember, the world is made of cheese and onions.

April 23, 2004

100 posts already? damn

Filed under: General — Xero @ 3:07 am

So I hit 100 posts and didn’t even notice. “The fall of good taste” was my 100th post (I think) I just counted down from the top as I currently have 107 posts, this will be 108. So I’ve decided to do a special “100th post thing” and dedicate it to stupidity, because the world is full of it.

So yet again I’m confronted with the challenges of debate and something went wrong. What it is, I do not know, I don’t get angry very easily despite the blows that were made against me, apparently the other person didn’t react the same way as I.

I suppose it’s hard for some people to talk about the very ideas their lives have been based upon without taking something personal. Maybe I have certain qualities about me that allows me to take a third person perspective and not get offended by certain things. Or maybe what they say is true, but if that’s so, why the anger? I didn’t even defend against many of the blows made against me. Maybe my emotionless responses to certain things makes others angry? Or makes me seem condescending?

Either way I hear the same thing time and time again every time this same situation has happened. You think you’re always right. You think you’re better than other people. You’re condescending. You’re arrogant.

While sometimes I might be a little arrogant I never go into a debate always thinking I’m right because I’m always open to new ideas. If the other person isn’t willing to help me see their perspective and gets angry when I get a few things wrong, it is impossible for me to validly see how it is. It’s hard to put yourself in other peoples shoes – and in the end the shoes don’t even fit, cause they’re not your shoes, like I said once before.

That doesn’t mean it’s impossible to at least try to understand, but I suppose some people just don’t have the same patience to deal with these things as I do and I will just have to respect that.

I don’t think I’m better than anyone and have always been about equality – everyone has their ups and downs and in the end it all works out. Even those I call stupid are smarter than me in some ways – just not ways that I respect, as they have to do with following others and dishonesty.

I can’t do anything but be myself so if that’s too hard for some people I will just have to take a good analysis of the situation and make a decision as to whether or not I want them in my life. I don’t want to have people angry at me, I don’t mean to offend anyone, but people get offended and it’s out of my control.

I can accept that, I can accept a lack of control, I just won’t give up unless I really have to – I don’t like seeing a friendship go down the train. I like to understand things and analyze situations. Maybe I seem nosey or as if I’m assuming things but it’s only because I want to understand.

I think the ultimate stupidity in the end is misunderstanding – because it tends to ruin everything over nothing. I think that’s the worst way for things to end.

April 22, 2004

spite

Filed under: General — Xero @ 12:08 am

Hey everyone, Brent says I’m emo.

(00:03:18) Brent: so jordan tell me how many people have u shown this convo to
(00:03:19) Brent: or wait
(00:03:22) Brent: how many are you going to
(00:03:22) Brent: lol
(00:04:09) Brent: i wouldnt be surprised if u had ure little pet im me backing u up or trying to make me feel bad in about 2 days or less
(00:04:19) Brent: but i think me saying that just stopped u from doing it
^ out of spite

He also enjoys talking to himself, long walks on the beach, and repeating a page full of song lyrics into instant message by memory.

Let’s all celebrate this joyful occasion with a tribute to Brent, the worlds most illogical arguer. The only defense I’ve ever seen him use is try to prove the opponent a hypocrite, which isn’t even a good defense in his case for two reasons.

A. being a hypocrite doesn’t make you wrong or right
B. it’s reusing old material, something he claims is bad (hypocrite?)

I don’t claim to be original or what not, but this is a guy who’s tried to be like me or my friend for years now, yet attacks me over original material? I don’t think so. I don’t even care about being original, I don’t have to be the first to say it, as long as it’s getting the damn point across.

Oh, sorry I called you a fag Brent, not really sure if you’re gay or not. My unconscious typo of calling you a fake still appears to be true though.

I’m an ass and I love it.

April 20, 2004

Anti-Religion Cult

Filed under: General — Xero @ 10:51 pm

So why hasn’t anyone ever started an anti-religion cult? There’s been cults against specific religions, by specific religions, but never a cult against all religion, by no religion.

Why not? I mean there’s got to be enough people to join and fight for the cause of stupid elimination.

Whether it be jesus, allah, whatever jew’s have, animal-headed-human-things, etc, none of them seem to be making any appearances. Let’s start a cult. I’m serious. Who’s with me?

Anti-religion cult for the purpose of elimination of all religion and false hope. Had a bad day? Too bad. Hell’s too good for you. Eternal pain? Guess that’s better than eternal nothing eh? Let’s not mention all the silly utopias that you supposedly get to if you somehow prove yourself worthy.

You’re all unworthy. You’re dirty, cheating, lying, tailless monkey people. I mean hey if you’re going to hate something you might as well hate them all and not just pick at specifics.

Hey why do people stereotype themselves? Don’t ask me, but now you’ve all got one less stereotype to worry about. No more religion, how do you like that?

Imagine a world without religion and I’d say you’re imagining an impossibility. Not to fear, logic is here! We’ll put the gas chambers to good use this time. No religion is exempt. Race doesn’t matter.

Our animal friends are quite good at proving morality and right and wrong are all relative and even our own actions should be enough to prove that but most people are too blind because they want to feel innocent or some bullshit like that.

Oh no I’ve sinned time to repent! I’m doing so by killing the religious. No more silly standards of good and bad. Even the supposed “good points” and “purposes” of the stories in religion are useless to me. Be kind and love and don’t cheat on your wife and don’t steal and don’t fuck your neighbors kids and don’t pee on the electric fence. Oh no, someone sinned, time for a modern day crucifixion. Time to build some more prisons.

And what’s with religious people saying that being non-religious is impossible? I even had one person go as far to tell me that religion is part of the brain. How pathetic, blinded by their own ignorance. Which is like being blind to being blind to a lie. That’s kind of pathetic. Sorry but obviously someone religious is biased and saying something like that has absolutely no merit, especially if they’re so blind they can’t even see otherwise. That’s why I say bring out the gas chambers. Not worth wasting time with that.

I’ve officially decided that I hate all religious meaning and purposes. If you need some silly high moral standard then just come up with it yourself and stop giving credit to some 2000 year old books. I’m not letting you use religion as a scapegoat for stupidity, sorry.

Morals piss me off. Manners piss me off. Being nice to people pisses me off. Being mean to people pisses me off. People piss me off. Hard candy pisses me off. Jesus pisses me off. Religion pisses me off.

I don’t even want to be considered good. Maybe I should start lying and cheating just out of spite. That’s unlike me and like me at the same time. Weird.

Who’s with me?

Hi.

Filed under: General — Xero @ 1:02 am

I hate everyone because they’re not me.

Sure that sounds pretty arrogant but I don’t really care. It’s true. The real deal is that I’m tired of bullshit, but that’s nothing new. I mean, I’ve always complained about bullshit, but the past week, well that’s just been so bullshitfullytastic that I’m even more annoyed than before.

So I’ve been exposed to much anger and me being already annoyed at the world am left wondering why the hell? Why is it that people get angry when they’re confused? Where in the decision making process does anger come in anyway?

Alright so I guess I am starting to see the picture here. Some people stay angry longer than others. Me, I just talk about it for a few minutes and it’s done with. Most of the times when I’m angry is because I’ve been disturbed. My grandparents are quite good at doing that.

In a few ways I think maybe I lack certain emotion compared to most people. Either that or I just deal with things in ways that have less emotion involved. Oh yeah, sound waves don’t have emotion, so shut the fuck up to anyone who says music has emotion. I’m tired of you people.

You know what? I’m tired of emotion. Not my own, just other peoples, it seems like I’m one of the only people who can deal with shit without doing something that pisses me off. I guess that makes sense – it’s why I’m me. I hate everyone because they’re not me.

Well it sounds arrogant but really – so many people relying on false hopes, power trips, fear, and other miscellaneous counter-productive things to solve their issues. Let’s take a few approaches to the problem.

Someone pisses me off. What else is new. Now, here’s some possible steps:

A. I believe in god and think they will go to hell
B. I think I’m better than them no matter what so it doesn’t matter
C. I get afraid and start plotting revenge

False hope, power trip, and fear. Of course I left out what I do, which is much simpler than all of those ridiculous responses. Know what I do? I deal with it. I talk with them about it, I discuss the situation, if that fails, they can go fuck themselves – I’ll just ignore em. If that fails, I’ll just write about how much I hate them because it’s fun.

Look at me! I’m cynical! I guess that’s something new. At least I’m not blind. It’s hard to be biased when you hate everything.

Now that’s just me trying to sound like I hate everything, yes, of course I don’t really hate everything, it’s just so easy to say I do because of the extremely large amount of things that I do hate.

Maybe I should make a list of things I do like? Let’s do it:

Good music
Cats
Pessimism with a dash of optimism
Computers
People who agree with me
People who don’t piss me off
People who don’t suck up
People who don’t lead blindly
People who don’t follow blindly
Cars that aren’t ugly
Good taste
Anime
Electronics
Things that I don’t hate until proved otherwise.
Me

Yeah, much shorter than the list of things I hate. It’s easy when it comes to what I like. It’s just the things I don’t like, those things are annoying.

I think at this point I can say that I like myself and other people’s company is nice because it wastes time which is pleasureful if done correctly. I have all this time so I might as well use it. Anyway I think the real point of the story is that other people aren’t me and that everyone’s been raised into their own little way of being, most of which annoy me.

I seem to return to a state of neutralness no matter what happens to me so I guess I’d make a bad example of someone with chronic depression. Oh yeah, and my cat, he’s cool, just thought I’d say that.

Of all the things we can’t control, you can control emotion. Some things may be impossible but that’s one thing I’m sure isn’t. It’s all about control, while we might not have any true form of control, self-control is something that most are capable with little effort. It’s just that most people want to be illogical because it provides a more instant sensation of pleasure, even if the pain resulting afterwards is greater.

I’m one to talk right? I love instant gratification, but not to the point of stupidity. I feel like pissing people off.

HEY EVERYONE, I HATE YOU! Also, I’m very fat and you’re going to die. And your house is on fire.

April 13, 2004

I hate my family

Filed under: General — Xero @ 8:49 pm

I hate my family. It’s true. I can’t stand them. Well, to be more specific, I hate my dads family. There’s a few neat people but it’s mostly insanity.

They’re all nags. All of them. They’re all spoiled, lazy, and demanding. It’s amazing they even get anything done the way they are. Okay more specifically my dads parents. They’re insane. The more time I spend around them the more insane I get. On top of the fact that I was raised much the same way. I’m glad some people were willing to tell me how stupid I was being at the time.

I don’t really put up with them so I have no problem yelling back at them. An eye for an eye, they will get a face full if they attempt to mess with me.

Normally they don’t bother me to the breaking point but with this bullshit with my dad going down it’s pretty insane around here. Lucky for me they’re usually only here at night most of the time.

Today was annoying though. Oh yeah, they don’t deserve to have a drivers license. 80 yrs old + driving = no. Scares the fuck out of me every time I have to sit in a car with them at the wheel.

Anyway, today was annoying. I walk in while I’m in the middle of helping my cousins friend change the tires on my dads car (which he shouldn’t have fucking bought/resold the old ones while he was still sick) and I walk up to grab the keys and they start bitching about some empty boxes that were on the floor. I said I’d take them out like 2 days ago but they’re so damn picky. They don’t seem to realize that I have things I do and I was out all day today and yesterday and on top of that it’s been raining like hell and not exactly the most logical time to do it.

On top of all this there’s the stress from my dads condition in general which is annoying as hell.

So anyway, I get home and have about an hour or two to myself (I hadn’t remembered the boxes, on top of that, still pouring outside) I walk up and they start yelling at me and shit so I grab the keys I was looking for and just walk away, I don’t want to deal with their bullshit. They’re flipping out and making it out to be that they’re doing it for my dad, as if my dad cares about some boxes on the god damn floor, he’s more of a slob then I ever will be. You know what he does care about though? The tires on his car.

Which is what I was helping out with, until the constant disturbances. I skipped eating dinner because I’m so stressed from it all I lost my appetite. Old people piss me off, I swear all old people are total nags, they just use their age as an excuse to boss me around.

Know what’s even more ridiculous? The boxes were for two lamps which I generously built for them. I’m tired of this bullshit. I do them favors and fix the god damn tv when they screw something up (like not turning it on or some other stupid crap) and I get nothing but bitching in return. I need to move out of here.

I hate everyone in this house, other than me and my cat. It’d be nice if someone here didn’t suck every once in a while.

April 12, 2004

Time

Filed under: General — Xero @ 12:06 am

How many years will it take before people realize god doesn’t exist? I’m serious.

Also, what’s with military commercials? Who in their right mind wants to do that shit? Sure it might pay but at the expensive of all dignity.

Anyway, I’ve been due for a list of things I hate (and people) for a while so let’s get started.

People who join the military
People who believe in god
People who say they were “just like you”
People who are ignorant (see above)
People who nag me to do unimportant tasks
People who are unable to learn anything without personal tutoring
People who like pop music
People who like disney
People who like copyright
People who like prohibition
People who argue invalid points, never get them across, and still do it anyway
People who say hysterical instead of hilarious
People who put the toilet paper roll on backwards (you know who you are)
People who like the PT Crusier, Honda Element, H2, Minivans, or SUV’s made by sports car manufacturers.
People who have no taste (see above)
Ad Council/AntiDrug/Truth Commercials
Propaganda
Advertisement
Apple
iPods
Elitists
Companies/trade groups that consistently screw people over in the name of good
Politicians
People who vote for republicans/democrats and actually think they made a difference
People who insist voting makes a difference
Vote commercials made by MTV
Viacom
People who disagree with me publicly then later on agree with me
People who disagree with me only later to agree with me and then at the end make it seem we agreed all along, as if to avoid admitting they changed their mind because of me
People who use logical fallacies
People who’s names are pronounced differently than they are spelled
People who say they are being sarcastic when they were just lying or being abusive
People who like something just because of how expensive it is
People who are blind to their own stupidity
People who disagree with the things I said here
Dolphins
Horses
Dogs
Humans

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